If the concept of a story is bad, no matter how good the writing is, it will be considered a bad story. Basic grammar helps but your formatting needs serious work.
Of Swords and Sorcery is one of those concepts that should have been strangled in its crib. It relies on too many deus ex machina's right from the get go (a trio of them), has a very horrid main character who seems to be unable to actually express emotion at all or understand the emotions of others, and the traits that he supposedly has never pop up when in reality they should. When a story from the get go is this crippled, it'd take a masterful author to raise it from "Needs to be deleted" to "Passable" and frankly Lantz, you are no where close to being a masterful author.
On the subject of theme, I can't see a single one in "Of Swords of Sorcery," aside from 'You should like Satoshi he is awesome guys,' which is also the intent apparently. When you write fanfiction centered around an OC, there's always this risk of something along these lines but this can be avoided by making the OC fit the universe and an actually likable character. Satoshi is neither of these two things, and in fact seems to be designed to do neither of those things. Satoshi is the main problem with 'Of Swords and Sorcery' and is the main reason the story doesn't work. If he was made less unbelieveable and less Gary Stu OC Donutsteel, he could work, but it'd involve some serious reworking of the character from the ground up.
By refusing to actually change anything about your story or characters you are committing the equivalent to taking a shotgun, blowing off both your feet, and kneecapping yourself, before blowing off a hand and then using the other hand to hack that arm off with a buzzsaw, then chaining yourself to a cinderblock and throwing yourself off a bridge into deep water. This is where your story could have seriously used outside feedback (though considering how stubborn you are I doubt you'd have actually even listened.) At this point, I'm questioning why I'm even bothering to point this all out.