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« on: October 20, 2013, 12:27:03 AM »
Name: INFERNO COP
Race: Human?
Age: Cop-years old
Height: Six feet or so
Weight: About as much as a skeleton and a cop outfit. And a gun. That, or he weighs as much as a car.
Eyes: Not present
Hair: A beautiful and glorious mane of animated fire
Appearance: He’s presumably fully a skeleton, wearing a cop outfit that really shows of his pecs very well. He has a fire-proof cop cap too, and is constantly holding a gun no matter what, unless he’s a car. As a car, he’s a really sweet racecar with his skeletal head at the front of it.
His head is also always on fire.
When he is glitter Inferno Cop, he shines with a golden sheen.
Alignment: Lawful Good, and then some other things, then Lawful Good again
Charisma: B (he inspires an entire town to cheer for him as he fights his final battle)
Strength: E (B as GIC)
Agility: E(B as GIC)
Speed:A+++ (as a racecar, E otherwise unless GIC, where it goes up to B)
Magic Resistance: C
Magic Ability: No magic
Other Abilities:Is bullet-reflective
Can turn into a racecar, which is also a time machine, but he’s had an operation since.
Can land from falls dozens of stories high as if he just walked down a stair.
Can fly as Glitter Inferno Cop
Is a Real God
Devil’s Satan Hellhound Grenda’s Kind Hand, Abbreviated to Devil’s Satan Hand, allows him to defeat any enemy at the cost of his life. Or it makes him a 20foot tall invisible giant who watches over us, who knows.
Origin: Inferno Cop is a cop who’s come back from hell to defeat the southern cross, the organization that killed his family. One of the first things he did was run through a cop and his car as the cop thought of illegally watching anime, which he did to go shoot up some people and save a pregnant lady. The pregnant lady’s water breaks, and there is a massive flood in the immediate area. Inferno cop saves her baby, and laments that one of the men who were assaulting her gave him a cross scar on his forehead, making him into one of the Southern Cross.
But then, the baby reveals itself as an agent of the southern cross, and turns into a scaly giant with a crab’s hand! He shoots it, and as it turns out it’s invulnerable to bullets. The bullet ricochets back at him, but Inferno cop is invulnerable to bullets as well! The bully ricochets to the baby monster, making him explode.
To speed the story up, he’s is brought to Trial, loses, gets sent to prison, gets into an accident on the way to prison, gets rescued by an evil organization that wants IC to kill himself due to medical bill debts, jumps into the streets in the middle of a future zombie apocalypse, in November 17th of 2087. He meets Mecha cop, who was born to destroy him, but his survival rate was of 120%. He rams Mecha cop in his time machine/car form, and warps back in time, to the cretaceous period. He meets dinosaurs and this savage tribe that treats him and Mecha cop as gods, until the real god shows up and slaps them into hell. They meet Inferno cop’s something or other, Grenda, and help her find Inferno Cop’s uncle. She shows them the way out, but Mecha cop stays. Inferno cop runs over some kid as his first deed in the world of the living, and that kid becomes HELLFIRE BOY, his sidekick. They sign up for a race together, so they can conquer the world with the prize money.
The race doesn't go too well and IC is lagging in second place, until he uses HELLFIRE BOY’s life as a fuel source to go faster. He goes past the speed barrier, but still ends in second place. He gets the prize money anyway, and gets an operation to make him not a car/time machine once more. He goes to bury HELLFIRE BOY in Egypt, and uses a 99 cents world cruise to get there. HE gets hungry and stops at a bread stand, only to find a piece of bread that looks like HELLFIRE BOY after he puts his sidekick’s glasses on it. He then eats the bread.
Next he goes into the pyramid, where he interrupts the unrivaled pharaoh’s fifteen hours of sleeps, and proceeds to defeat him in single combat. He then goes into the pharaoh’s sarcophagus, until he gets a call to return to Jack Knife Edge Town from his boss. He runs there, and is greeted by the police department being struck by lightning, which came from an alien spaceship. Aliens then kidnap him and use his status as a false god to trigger the third destroy finale, which will lead to another worldwide extinction, just like it did for dinosaurs and bell bottoms. This will lead the world to its ideal state, and evolve Inferno cop to a Real God.
After it happens, everyone is inferno cop, except for that cat. As it turns out, that pregnant lady was so impressed by IC saving her that she attempted and succeeded at making a world filled with Inferno Cop. A world that has nothing but IC and her, where they can be together forever. IC thinks that a world with no war or shoplifting is a good thing, until he pukes up the HELLFIRE BREAD, who reminds him of his objective and to not give up. Inferno cop then eats the bread again.
IC affirms that he is the one and only Inferno Cop, and becomes Glitter Inferno Cop, his final form, where the fire enveloping his head becomes golden. He is also a Real God, at this point. All the people who had become inferno cop because of the pregnant lady revert to their normal selves, and Inferno Cop states that that’s the power of humanity and that she shouldn’t underestimate it. The pregnant lady shoots at him with a machine gun that was in her belly, but Inferno Cop remains bulletproof.
He proceeds to beat the crap out of a pregnant lady.
He powers up his final move, and the pregnant lady takes her chance: she fires her entire body, minus the head, as a massive boomerang to finish him. Hope seems lost, but Mecha Cop, who was made to protect him, and Grenda appear and shoot the boomerang out of the sky. Inferno Cop now uses his final strike, the Devil’s Satan Hellhound Grenda’s Kind Hand, to defeat and kill the pregnant lady once and for all.
His story ends as he watches over a grown-up Hellfire Boy and his Girlfriend from Arizona, as they chill on his bouncing car.
It is as he ponders if anyone will remember him that he wakes up in a Nexus city hospital with a living(?) body, where a Ghost Rider brought him in thinking he was one of his people. Inferno Cop, in a moment of glory and nostalgia, runs out the hospital’s seventh floor window into a pack of wild Gelatinous Cubes.
And this is where it all starts.
Weakness: Irreversibly fated to be the protagonist to the best story ever told, has severe ADD, might be retarded
Likes: Black bread, Money
Dislikes: The Southern Cross organization, Shoplifting
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